Back-to-School Angst

Target Tantrums & That Familiar August Panic

Every August, without fail, I find myself in the middle of Target clutching a list, sweating through my t-shirt, and staring at a wall of folders like I’m trying to crack the Da Vinci Code. Do we have enough? What supplies to my kids need? Why am I spiraling over binders? AGAIN? The truth is, back-to-school season is this weird emotional cocktail: one part excitement, two parts chaos, garnished with a pit-in-your-stomach feeling that screams “YOU ARE NOT READY.” (Spoiler: you are. Kind of.) By the time the students arrive, I’ve already fought the new copier, survived seven meetings, and wrestled with class rosters along with classroom setup. We’re decorating walls, answering emails, dodging drama, trying to remember why we teach, and pretending all is well.

The Harsh Truth About Replaceability

I’ve always known I’m replaceable. That’s the reality of education: if I left today, someone else would be standing in my room tomorrow armed with nothing but a seating chart and delusion. And while that stings, it also gives me some perspective. You can't pour from an empty glass.

Here’s just a peek inside the chaos of my brain:

• Emotional whiplash: psyching myself up while feeling dead inside

• Pre-stressing about student behavior before they’ve even learned my name

• Wondering: Can I survive another year?

• Mixed Communications

• Unrealistic expectations (mostly the ones I’ve created for myself)

• 36 students + 22 desks = teacher math rage

• Roster Changes

• Spending my paycheck on flair pens and snacks

• Anxiety, burnout, and a sprinkle of sleep deprivation

Survival Tools: Pepsi, Snacks, and One Compliment

Sometimes the only thing holding me together is a cold Pepsi (yes, I said Pepsi > Coke) and a single compliment from someone who noticed how hard I’ve been working. If you haven’t had your “Hey, thanks for all you’re doing” moment yet...let me say it now: I see you. You’re doing amazing. Also, please go hydrate.

Finding Time to Decompress (aka: Hiding)

The transition from school to home is brutal. Kids aren’t the only ones who need downtime. We do too. Whether it’s zoning out with music, scrolling TikTok under a blanket, or zoning out staring at a wall, you need that time. I recently started watching the trees outside and thought, “Wow, maybe I’m turning into someone who hikes.” (I’m not. But the effort counts.) We also plan to start a 30-minute “don’t ask me for anything” rule when someone gets home. I used to launch into my to-do list and wonder why everyone got quiet or snappy. Now, I try to give grace because I know how awful it feels to walk into chaos right after you escape chaos.

Transitions Are Hard (For Grown-Ups and Kids)

This year, I’ve got a senior and a freshman. First time in the same building since elementary and I am not okay. My youngest is small for his age and adorable in a way that makes me worry someone might try to stuff him in a locker (do they still do swirlies?!). New school years bring big anxiety. Will they find friends? Will they get lost? Will I ugly cry after the first day of school? (Probably.)

Final Thoughts: Lower the Bar (Seriously)

It's not just school supplies, but it's the mental load. But the real stress? Pretending I can be emotionally available to my own family after a full day of emotional triage. So this year, try this:✨ Lower the bar.✨ It's okay to nod even if you have no idea what's going on.✨ Eat the snack.✨ Ask for help.✨ Give yourself grace and ✨ Smile. I will try my best to take my advice. Good luck, everyone!