The 5th of July Survival Guide

Well, congratulations. You survived America’s most chaotic celebration: July 4th. Between the charred hot dogs, sunburn, and that one neighbor who bought illegal-level fireworks off the dark web, we did it. Freedom was loud and ultimately exhausting.

But here we are: July 5th. And if you’re a teacher, this day hits differently. Sure, other people are feeling dehydrated and taking care of their headaches or burned yards. But Me? I’m sitting up in a daze thinking, Wait. Is it July already? That means pre-planning starts soon! I fall to my knees and scream “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Does anyone ever stop to appreciate the other freedoms we have around the 4th? Like the glorious freedom to use the restroom whenever we want? The freedom to make midweek plans we fully intend to cancel out of exhaustion? The freedom to eat when hunger strikes and not during lunch duty. Let’s not forget the freedom to send unhinged TikToks at any hour and laughing guilt-free, without the looming anxiety of needing eight hours of sleep just to be “on” for a room full of chaos the next day. Here are some steps to consider when recovering from the last holiday until school starts again.

Step 1: Hydrate!

Confession time: I haven’t had a vegetable since June 24th, and I’ve consumed coffee at twice the rate of water. At this point, my body is roughly 85% sodium, caffeine, and poor life choices. Time to hydrate and especially before you randomly decide to rearrange your entire desk or classroom closet for funsies.

Step 2: Slowly Return to the Land of the Living!

Open your email (deep breath), check the school calendar (scream again), and grab your planner. Or, if you’re like me, you never really unplug because mentally clocking out just isn’t a thing. I thrive in controlled chaos and when things are too calm, that’s when I start causing trouble.

Step 3: Target Dollar Spot Is a Trap

The bin is not your friend. You went in for toothpaste and dog treats. Now you’re $72 deep into bins and excited to find mini erasers shaped like ice cream cones. Breathe. Turn around. Step away. You are not required to decorate your classroom like your saved Pinterest posts. (But if you ydo, I won’t judge. I’ll just ask for the link). By the way, have you seen any of the coach’s classrooms? The majority of them have a minimalist mindset. That’s what we’ll call it.

Step 4: Start the Gentle Mental Prep

No need to panic but yes, you might want to start shifting bedtime back from 2:00 AM to something less “college freshman.” Also, start building your tolerance back up for small talk, meetings with questionable agendas, and hearing the phrase “data-driven”, without visibly twitching.

Step 5: Pretend You’re Planning

Open laptop. Surround yourself with juicy pens. Light a candle. Look productive. However, instead of lesson plans, you’re googling BTS looks and how to manage time wisely. This counts! Mentally and emotionally it counts.

Final Thoughts:

The 5th of July is the point in the summer halfway between I’m never going back and one more visit to Teachers Pay Teachers. Be kind to yourself. Ease back into it. You're not lazy. You’re just in teacher recovery mode. If you made it through a holiday that involved kids, explosives, sugar, and heat, then pre-planning will be a breeze. Remember, you are doing a better job than the substitute, Mr. Garvey.